No Regrets (Day 83)

I feel like my stomach still isn't completely recovered from the Florida trip. A combination of fast food, alcohol, consecutive 14-hour car rides, and the saltwater of the ocean has left my stomach weak and powerless. It doesn't help that all I've eaten since I returned is some spicy spaghetti. Even after popping countless Tums I'm still feeling some acidic rumblings--unusual for me since I absolutely love spicy food and seldom suffer ill effects from it.

Its worth noting that I finished Pokemon Y while on the road trip, but I'm not completely ready to talk about that yet. I'm still catching Pokemon and battling; I imagine I'll still be playing it for quite some time, especially online. For right now, though, I'm in recovery mode. I'm going to relax for probably the next couple of days until I feel something approaching normal, and then I'm going to start seriously looking for jobs again. It's something I've been putting off for way too long and I'm not going to stand for it any longer.

The Florida trip is something I needed. I got to spend some more time with my friend Scott before he lives on his mission trip to Bulgaria and I got to spend some more time out of space. If anything it just further reinforces the point that I'm never going to be happy here in Kentucky. I've known this for a very long time but I've sometimes flirted with the idea that maybe I'm kidding myself and I'd be depressed anywhere. This isn't true; I'm not even sure I'm naturally a cynical person! My environment has worsened my personality considerably and I have no desire for it to continue. However, the only way I'll be on my way to getting out of here is if I can put myself into a position to save up some money.

I'm in a lot of debt that will take some time to chip through, but I'm up to the challenge. I have been so complacent and lazy in my life--with brief moments of optimistic determination. I have to figure out how to make that my default mode of operation. It'll be tough, for sure, but I have to figure out how to do it.