Avalanche (Day 233)

I've been spending my time today on washing my car and playing a lot of League of Legends. My car is in pretty poor condition but the wash made it look a bit better. It's still a tad dented and there are spots of rust here and there--but it'll do. My uncle and cousins are helping me and my mother in our current poor financial situation--and hopefully they'll also assist me in landing a job. Once I get insurance on my vehicle and get the tags up to date, I'll be able to drive around without the fear of getting pulled over and fined. That'll be a nice change of pace. Getting the brakes fixed will be nice too, since they've been making an awful grinding noise for the past. . .couple of years or so.

I need to get out and be more active, though. Getting a job at this point is going to be a tough adjustment because I've been firmly seated in front of my computer for the majority of the past six months. I'd like to start going on walks/runs again, but the weather has been pretty poor for it. I think it's starting to warm up, but the temperature still seems pretty unpredictable.

I'm feeling a little bit better about my situation, I guess. I'm sure I'm not going to end up with the greatest of jobs, but it'll be nice to be making money again. There's a lot of debts that I have to pay off--and aside from that, it'll be nice to shop for my own food again and to buy stuff for myself. Even though I have a massive backlog, I like the idea of being able to actually buy new games. Plus, there are some games that are must-buys for me like the upcoming Super Smash Bros title for the Wii U. 

I'm also really nervous. I remember the last time I worked and I wasn't in the greatest of moods. I don't want to fall prey to depression or wake up in the morning and be miserable with my life. I haven't felt that way lately even though my situation is a little bleak. I like being in new social situations but if I'm surrounded with people I dislike it obviously makes me unhappy. I'm just nervous about the kind of people I'm going to meet and the mood that it's going to put me in. 

It's important that I get things going again, though. I can't just sit here in my home and stagnate like I have been. I've said these kinds of things to myself over and over so it's starting to sound a bit like a broken record. I hope that I actually listen this time.