1944 (Day 296)

I'm still not feeling all that well. I really hope this wears off by tomorrow, because I've gotta be at work by 8 AM and I'd like to enjoy the chicken biscuits that have been promised to me. I don't feel as sick as I did yesterday, but the fact remains that I'm not out of the woods yet and I find that just annoying enough to prevent me from enjoying much of anything. Food in particular is bringing me no pleasure, which is extremely out of character for me considering my rabid appreciation for food under normal circumstances. I've also been dealing with a pretty consistent headache all day and aspirin seems to be having little to no effect on it.

This whole situation has made me think about my general health a lot. I have no clue what brought this on, but it's made me realize how poorly I've been eating lately. I don't feel like I'm the kind of person that needs a lot of food to function, but I have an unfortunate tendency of eating a lot just because I'm bored or want to reward myself in some way. I enjoy food. I really do. When I'm not sick, I look forward to eating food and take a lot of pleasure in it. I generally don't hold back or try to minimize the size of my portions. There are two major problems that come from this, of course. One, I gain weight, and two, I spend way too much money on food. These are both things I could do without.

I'm not as much concerned with being overweight as I am with being unhealthy. Although I'm not satisfied with my body, I feel I'm at a stage in my life where I am at least taking the first steps toward tolerating it. However, if I could generally feel better on a daily basis, that would be great. I think maintaining a better diet and exercising would assist me considerably in feeling better about myself. It's a proven fact that exercise releases endorphins that straight up make you feel better. It also increases your endurance and stamina, both of which are really helpful in the event of a long day at work. I have a pretty low activity job right now, but it's definitely not going to hurt me to be in better shape regardless.

I have historically not gotten sick very often, but there have been too many days to count where I just felt bad. Lethargy and apathy are incredibly common for me even when I can't think of a source for them. Some might immediately relegate those emotions to depression, and I'm sure that's part of it. Despite my situation in life, I can't honestly say I feel I'm suffering from crippling depression, however. I think if I tried to be more active and ate better food in general, my attitude would improve considerably. Back when I was going on walks/runs very often about six months ago, there was a pretty noticeable improvement to my attitude. I ended up falling out of the habit because I got bored more than anything else. Surprisingly, laziness had less to do with it.

Running is not that fun for me just because my body type and level of fitness make it very difficult and painful, but walking I actually enjoy a lot. After awhile, though, the novelty wears off, and I get bored of walking down the same path every day. It would be a lot more fun and engaging if I had someone to chat with while I was doing it. I don't have a ton of friends, though, and almost none of them live nearby. It seems unlikely I'll have this kind of opportunity any time soon, but I'll be on the lookout.