Farewell to the Pressure Kids (Day 354)

Today was yet another long and stressful day. For the first time in a long time, I didn't get hope until around 9:30. It reminds me of the days I worked at Walmart and never got off before 11 o'clock. Getting home that late is pretty depressing. People who get off during the daytime take it for granted, I think. There's something about driving home in the sunlight that makes me feel better about the remainder of my day--even if I know full well that I'll have to get up early in the morning.

I don't like driving in the dark. I have terrible night vision and I'm always paranoid that I'm going to get into some kind of accident. Driving in the dark tonight made me nervous because I haven't done it in months. I pulled out in front of someone awkwardly because I had invested so much in just. . . second-guessing myself. Thankfully I managed to self-correct, but it was still went a long way toward heightening my anxiety. I'm lucky that it didn't start raining until I got home, because that would have greatly compounded my worries.

It's weird--I drove home in the dark for probably four years when I was working at Walmart, but I feel like I never really got used to it. I have poor night vision. I think I honestly just have poor vision in general (I do wear glasses, after all) but in the dark I feel particularly vulnerable. It's always been a concern of mine. Working at a job that allows me to leave earlier in the day has gone a long way in preserving my peace of mind. As stressful as this job can be, I really do like it for the most part. It's not my dream job and I can't say it's intensely fulfilling--but it's so much better than a lot of my other options. I could certainly have it so much worse. I hope things continue to go well there.

I don't like to think about it, but being fired (or pressured to resign, I guess) would be pretty devastating to me. I've held the job for maybe two and a half months now and I feel like I'm pretty good at it. It's a position for which I feel I have considerable aptitude. My numbers aren't earthshatteringly impressive but I do feel like I hold my own--and I think I have a knack in particular for insuring my customers are extensively informed about the products they have available to them.

Phew. Alright, I'm going to go play some Divinity. One of these days pretty soon I'm going to vomit out another mega-entry on that game. I enjoy it a lot! It's one of my favorite games in some time.