Amnesia: On terror and procrastination

Day 382

I'm in danger of falling out of my routine if I don't start writing this right away! Unfortunately, it's 10:30 PM and I haven't yet thought of anything to write about. I wonder if maybe I could think of something while writing--just sort of on the fly. Alright, it's not working yet. I'm sure I'll get there.

Truth be told, a friend has come over tonight and it's prompted me to look into some of the games that are in my backlog at the moment. I've experimented with Amnesia: The Dark Descent as well as Baldur's Gate II: Throne of Bhaal, both of which I've been putting off for a very long time for vastly different reasons. In the case of Amnesia, I find the game absolutely terrifying and I'm a bit of a wuss--although I greatly admire the craftmanship that's gone into the game, both on a technical and creative level.

Amnesia has excellent sound and art design that combine to perfectly create an eering and unsettling atmosphere. No matter how much I try to rationalize what's happening, when the deformed ghoul shuffles toward me, his guttural rasp echoing throughout the castle's hallways, I'm afraid for my very life. Rationally, I can tell myself that it's just a video game and none of this is real--but I've spent a better part of my life learning how to suspend my disbelief and become immersed in video games. It is for this reason that Amnesia is particularly effective on me.

I've heard a lot of folks say that Amnesia doesn't scare them. That's fine. I believe them and don't doubt they're far braver persons than I--but I'll be the first to say they're missing out. The ability to immerse yourself in a game significantly bolsters one's enjoyment of it, I feel, and particularly of a game like Amnesia. It's that sense of imagination and openness that makes a game like that so spellbinding for so many reasons. But it's also why I have so much trouble making progress on it. Every hallway is a harrowing trek through my own personal psychoses. Every time I finish playing, I feel like I need a therapy session.

I'm making a personal vow that I will one day finish Amnesia. It might not necessarily be soon, but I'm not going to cull it from my backlog by any means. It could very well be the last game I conquer, but I promise it will happen. Then I'll be in the perfect position to play Amnesia: A Machine for Pigs.

Or not.