Jumble

I have reached level 50 in Final Fantasy XIV and acquired my final dragoon ability. I haven't finished out the story quests and there's a ton of content I haven't experienced yet--but I think it still feels right to take a break from it for now. I may not renew my subscription right away. It's expiring in a few days. I've been devoting a considerable amount of time to the game for a month now and I think it would be nice for me to spend some time on some other games. I still need to finish Bayonetta 2 and maybe work some more on clearing out my backlog. Then again, Smash Bros and Persona Q are both coming out quite soon and I'd definitely rather focus on those.

I am ludicrously tired at the moment and considered at length not writing a blog entry at all. I really don't feel extremely pressured to write these entries anymore. My update schedule is still roughly once a day, but my updates are frequently coming in after midnight these days. One could make the argument that I've missed a couple of days lately. I can't really bring myself to get upset about it, though. If I had more interesting things to write about, I imagine I'd write about them! Then again, maybe I"m not feeling super reflective, even if I am interested in the stuff I'm writing about. After all, I have recently purchased a new console, a whole new wardrobe, and hit my activation quota at the last minute at work today. These are presumably interesting things to write about and things that should excite me--but I'm focusing more on the fact that I am exhausted right now.

My mother finally took her dogs to a shelter today. I've been taking care of them for a long time but never much cared for them. They're all really old dogs and they bark incessantly at all hours of the night. My mother didn't have room for them in her place. It wasn't fair for her to saddle me with the responsibility of taking care of them, but if I were a more gracious person I might have shouldered the burden gracefully. They were not well-trained dogs, though, and there was nothing I could do to change that even if I was capable of training dogs in the first place. They were too old and set in their ways. As a result, the room they stayed in was frequently a smelly mess that I loathed the thought of entering. I'm glad I don't have to deal with that anymore, but I have to admit I feel a little bad for my mother. She loved those dogs and had to give them up because I couldn't handle the responsibility of taking care of them.

Of course, those dogs have also been somewhat a part of my life for years and years, too. It's weird that they're gone now and that I'm partially responsible for it. I never demanded that they be taken away but I heavily insinuated I was unhappy with the situation. It was my cousin that took the initiative to approach my mother about the situation--and she listened to her. I'm still not sure what to make of the situation. In the long run I think it's for the best, but I'm moderately depressed over it even so.

I definitely need to rearrange things in here soon. I think that'll be good for my creative flow. I need to be able to sit at a desk or some kind of table. I'm kind of tired of placing my keyboard in my lap or on my leg. I'd also like to sit a tad closer to my screen, despite the fact that it's already gigantic. I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to do this setup, but I have a few ideas. If it's strictly necessary, I might find a way to haul my desk out of my old bedroom and move it in here. A slightly longer term goal would be to purchase a more comfortable computer chair--and by longterm, I mean probably next month when I get my next commission check. Man, commission is a wonderful thing.